Affirmation in the thick of things.

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Seems like we women have a hard time with things.

Between agonizing over staying home with the kids and needing affirmation from the world, we’re just in a tough place.

I personally would never have made it this far without constant reminders from my friends that I can’t seek affirmation in “how things are going.” You know that calculus that we are involved in (probably just by dint of being women):

Things going good = I’m good.

{Everything handmade, children looking adorable in photo shoot, house clean by 9 am and renovated by Christmas, husband feeling well cared for, weight down, waist wasp-like, mani/pedi scheduled, carpets spotless, dog winning trials, credit cards paid up.}

There’s a bit of a paradox here, because I actually think that getting good at what we do helps us be happy and find contentment. 

But only if it’s in the context of a hearty acceptance of the predictable awfulness of things, and I mean that in the most cheerful way possible — especially when “what we do” involves children, who necessarily are not going to be as tractable as, say, machines.

Clever men, focusing on machines! Sure, run your factory! “Oh, the machines broke down at the factory today!” Boo hoo! I bet they stood still while you tried to fix them and didn’t start crying because you forgot their special bear or gave them the wrongly colored cup, did they not? Sure, manage your accounts! (Those are kinds of machines, if you think about it a certain way — well, they’re not toddlers, now, are they?) I bet your accounts don’t stuff Legos into the toilet. Read more

Republished by permission: Like Mother, Like Daughter